Throughout the contact improvisation module I have experienced a series of different emotions and has occasionally made me question my ability in this practice. However it taught me the a fear of failure does not mean to give up or stop trying in something that I ‘can’t’ do or when trying something new does not work the first time trying.
This module had made me a stronger person mentally, as this module has proved the most difficult for me to manage this semester, and a stronger dancer physically as my body is now able to do things I would have assumed impossible at the start of the module, including inversions, allowing my weight to leave the floor and lifting other people. I am proud of what i have achieved throughout the module and hope to continue practicing Contact Improvisation in the near future.
The beginning of the semester was full of frustration for me, feeling like I was at a lower ability to other people in the group I always struggled to have the confidence to try new things and work with other people, often finding myself contributing with a solo within a jam or working with people I am familiar with and creating contact in subtle ways. I remember thinking that was not where I wanted to be, however looking back it is clear to me that it was a start to the practice and there would have been more people in a similar situation to me. Reading back on the blogs I had written at the start of my practice it is amazing how much my opinion of contact improvisation has developed along with my capability; I feel that I am now a point similar to what I wished to be in the first weeks.
Weeks five and six are where I can pin point a change in my practice. With week 5 being reading week, the feedback i received allowed me to realize that my frustration and difficulty was going to hold me back, and finding a confidence would improve the content i was creating and develop my skills as it would help me to try new things. After reading week I found myself contributing more in jams and gradually developed the skills to remain in the space for the duration of a jam and move around the space to find new people to work with. Working with new people, and different amounts of people each week, impacted my practice by allowing me to acknowledge different things within a conversation between the body or bodies I was working with; knowing when my body was tired and I needed to briefly exit the space for water, acknowledging the other possibilities of frames and movements when things get ‘stuck’ or go ‘wrong’ and that doesn’t mean the conversation has to end, and accepting when the movement is exhausted and when is best to a new partner and explore something new.
